Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Creativity Day 17: Future Husband Letter

So here's a letter that my friends wrote in my journal two years ago when I was in Vienna (it's dated June 19, 2010). Funny how everything's changed, except for a few things that haven't.
(ALSO, just to clarify, I no longer have any intention of marrying for money.)

To Hannah's future husband,
You will be rich, that's a fact. Hannah knows it, though she didn't necessarily marry you for your money. But a word of advice: keep your hand on your wallet. She likes to buy expensive things, she will justify her purchase with things like "I'm in Europe, when else can I buy this?" or "I just got married, I think I need it."
When you move in together don't be shocked to find boxes and boxes of key chains. She's not a serial killer, just slightly obsessed. But beware when she gets angry she tends to swear a little bit. Don't take it personally, it just happens.
Hannah is classy; cheap knock-offs don't cut it. She will scorn you immediately. Be especially careful with the proposal. If you screw up the first time, there will be no second time. You had better know her better than that.
We met Hannah when she was 15. She was sassy and a smart-ass. I'm sure it will get worse with age. But that is mostly likely one of your favorite qualities about her. And it will sure make the bedroom scene entertaining. Especially with phrases like, "voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir?" Because it's always sexy when a lady speaks French.
Hannah is very smart, she knows a lot about a lot of things. She enjoys reading books and writing essays. In your home we suggest a large library. If she didn't mary you for money, then it was books.
Whether or not you are a nice black man with a British accent I know she will love you very much. It wouldn't hurt to have nice cars and a huge house, but I'm sure it won't really matter. We hope you two have many wonderful adventures around the world: staying in nice hotels with giant bath towels and eating fine cuisine in nice restaurants. Let her indulge in an occasional key chain or maybe a diamond and all will be good.
Take care of our girl, she really is one of a kind.
Amelia, Mika, and Ale

PS. In case you were wondering, those girls are darling. We had a great summer.

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