Thursday, March 31, 2011

Hiking Boots

Tonight my family and I walked into REI. We went straight to the shoe section. I found a salesperson, and said, "I need hiking boots. I have no idea what kind I want, but I need good ones."
"Okay, what kind of hiking are you going to be doing?"
She gave me this you're an idiot look.
The woman next to her, a customer, said, "that's a great starting one."
So the saleslady pulled boot after boot after boot. I learned all about the way hiking boots are supposed to fit. You can't have them too small or too big because if you're feet slide down and hit the end you're toenails will turn black and fall off. If you put you're toe at the end though, you want a comfortable finger behind your heel and the back of the boot. Once you buy the boots, you have to wear them around the house for a day too make sure they're just right. But most importantly, you must tie them tight.
I tied so many pairs of boots so tight I literally wore the skin off my fingers in 3 places. Beginner's mistake.
After all that I got this lovely pair of hiking boots:

They're super hot.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011


I'm not an especially energetic babysitter. Actually, I rather hate babysitting. But I have fun babysitting my cousins. There are three of them. Shayna is 9 and the little sister I never had. Josh is 6, absurdly sweet and a little too energetic. Lizzy is 3. She's fits the 3-year-old stereotype better than any 3-year-old I know. She's cut her own hair twice, and last time I went over there she was wearing purple heart leggings with a pink leotard over it, with a blue skirt over that, mismatched socks and mismatched shoes.

So last time I babysat, I was doing my usual babysitting thing. The kids and I played wii for a couple hours. I get really into the wii with them. Wii is no fun at all is you have actual competition. Especially because my coordination is so terrible. But when you play with kids it's great because there is absolutely no pressure. So then it's just about beating your own high score, which is definitely way better than beating your friend's high score. That sort of competition makes your friend your enemy.
After the wii escapade (they have yet to beat my wii wake boarding high score) I realized that I should probably get them dinner, because that's what adults do. They feed kids. But feeding the kids means heating up hot dogs or chicken nuggets in the microwave. And I always feel guilty doing that because it feels like I'm feeding them poison (thank you JSF). Not only is it meat, but it's the ground up rejections of already disgusting "food". Plus, that means I have to make my own dinner, which is a huge stretch on my domestic capacities.
So in a moment of inspiration I said, "hey guys, let's have milkshakes for dinner!"
Not surprisingly, they agreed wholeheartedly with my choice of dinner. So we pulled out the industrial strength Hamilton Beach milkshake maker, the milk, the oreos, and of corse the ice cream. We had our oreo milkshakes in our big milkshake mugs.
After milkshakes, more wii, and the going to bed routine, I was tucking Shayna in when she said, "Hannah, you're the best babysitter ever."

Friday, March 25, 2011

Princess and the Pea

Cinderella is my favorite princess. But lately I feel like princess and the pea.

Love Dina Goldstein's fairytale portraits

See here's what happens. I get up at 7 and get to school by 7:45. Then I spend 7 hours at school. Then I work until 7. So at that point I've been going 12 hours. Then I come home tired. So I start homework. But I fall asleep, because my will power is 0. So then I wake up like 8:30 and do homework. But at that point I've had just enough sleep that I'm not tired enough to sleep even though I'm worn out. So I do homework and turn my lights out at like 11:30. But I can't sleep. So by the time I finally go to sleep it's a little after midnight. Then my alarm goes off at morning and I curse as I turn it off. So I get through my day courtesy of lots of caffeine and repeat the cycle.

My life is hard, okay?

I promise, next post will be a story.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Pretty little car

Actually, my car is big enough to be it's own nation. But it is pretty now.  It looks all new like this one:

My poor car has suffered through a lot. A few months after buying it, we took it off roading in Moab. In hindsight, probably not the best idea. The front left bumper got a dent the size of a dinner platter. Then, I got my license. For the first 4 hours it was great, then I realized how enormous it is and how expensive gas is when you get 12 mpg. Within 2 weeks of me getting my license, I hit another car. Backed into it really, and that put a dent the size of a dinner plate in the back bumper. Since then I've hit: my garage door, several traffic cones, a road sign, another car (but it wasn't bad so they didn't call the insurance), a mailbox, a rock, and a tree. Note that there is nothing living on that list. Anyway, needless to say it needed repair. So over spring break it spent a week in the shop and got a new front and back bumper. Now it's good as new.
Until I hit the next thing.

ps. The color of my car is called "twilight". Now I obviously didn't pick it, my dad did. (technically it's not even my car - it's the third car, but when there are three cars and three drivers it logically becomes mine). Anyway, I'm kinda defensive about my car being "twilight". Why couldn't they think of a better name for that color?

Sunday, March 20, 2011

It was an epic fight

but this week kicked my ass:
1) apush test the first day back from break
2) english in-class essay
3) physics - electricity- the circuit does what?
4) 19 hours at work
5) 4 hours babysitting
6) practice sat - 4 hour test
7) never did make it to bed before midnight

But next week I will conquer! Napoleon did it, so can I. We're the same height you know.

ps. here's my story about this painting. We learned all about it in ap euro last year. I distinctly remember spending about 15 minutes on this painting. Then one day that summer in Vienna, I was in the Belvedere and lo and behold I turned a corner and saw this huge painting I had studied. Granted, the artist did make 5 of them, so my chances were pretty good, but still it was very exciting. I love it when things I learn in school apply to real life. I think the crossover between school and life is one of the most rewarding things I ever get to experience. 

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Bicycle Wheel

There are two things that make me want to leave the intellectual community forever and become a plumber: poetry and modern art. I know they're supposed to be great. I can have them explained to me, and appreciate it, but I rarely see either and fall in love like I do with a Steinbeck novel or a Monet painting.
Last week when I was at the MoMa, I saw this infamous statue. The explanation behind it is that art isn't useful by combining these two practical objects, the artist made them both useless therefore they become art.
I think that's brilliant. It's my new (only) favorite piece of modern art. I like people who can think. Plus, doing that was pretty bold. I like bold people. I want to be friends with the artist. 

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Unsent Letter

Dear Females of Utah,

There are several points that need clarification before either of us can move on with our lives:

1. You are not above capitalization, proper punctuation or full sentences.
The pronoun "I", proper nouns, and the first letter of a sentence is capitalized. I promise I'm not making it up, it's common knowledge. If you don't believe me read a book, any book; even Dr. Seuss did it. Furthermore, you fail to understand the concept of a period. It's the little dot that signifies you have finished a sentence. It is not something you put after a single word, which leads me to your greatest problem. You seem to have missed the 14 years of school when we learned how to make sentences. Writing things like photography.indie.rainboots.curiosity.laughing. is just not acceptable. Okay?

2. The proper way to use the word "lover".
First of all, referring to your significant other simply as lover is stupid. Please, just put the little adjective "my" in front of it, please. Furthermore, I don't think you really understand the word lover. Let's look to the two example sentences Merriam-Webster gives us for lover:

  1. His wife accused him of having a secret lover.
  2. She left her husband and ran away with her lover

Lancelot was Guinevere's lover, and Paris was Helena's. Get the gist?

3. Sarah Palin is not a good role model.
I don't care that her "politics" are in line with what the church preaches, nor that she's "such a good mom", nor that she is a great example of "someone with a successful career who also managed to have a family". She's a terrible politician, and perpetually makes herself look like an idiot. You want a good example of a woman who accomplished shit? Eleanor Roosevelt

On the topic of politics

4. Either know what you're talking about of keep your mouth shut.
 I don't want to hear you say how liberal you are because you think it's cool to be liberal. We both know you're homophobic and believe a woman's ultimate purpose is to be a mother. Neither do I want to hear to regurgitate the conservative rants you've heard from your parents. I promise, it doesn't make you seem smart. I can tell you don't actually know what you're saying. Tell me what you think or change the subject.

So yes, I am judging you. I would apologize, but it would look something like this:

Rant and defend yourself all you want,

ps. Sincerely sorry if this doesn't apply to you, just laugh with me.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

The ramblings

Have you ever noticed how latte machines sound like breathing tubes? They have the same steady rhythm of blank noise. And they're both turned out in favor of something that seems bigger- the conversation or book or website. Yet it seems that without either of them the world wouldn't spin round.
Today I was standing on a street corner waiting for the red hand to be replaced by the green man. Next to me was a man in worn corduroys and an old western shirt. He could have been an art student and he just as easily could have been a homeless person. He was holding a coffee cup with the last few ounces left. A woman in a beautiful (must have been Burberry) trench coat walked by and dropped a dollar in his cup. He looked up incredulously. She kept walking by and I heard him mutter under his breath, "that coffee cost more than a dollar".
Remember when converse were the shoes to have? Then knock-off converse started showing up. Then the big brands started making converse. And before you knew it you could pay $130 for a pair of jcrew imitation converse instead of $60 for the real deal. Well now Toms are the shoe to have. The other day, a girl showed up at school wearing a pair of knock-off Toms because "the real ones are way expensive". 
I have a serious problem with Toms. I think it's pretty incredible the amount of shoes they've been able to donate. But it really bothers me that as a culture we won't help others unless there's something in it for us. Yes, having all those shoes donated is a great thing. But imagine how much more could have been done if every one of those customers had donated $60.
I'm a purist and an idealist. I like books and will never read on a kindle or iPad. I judge people who get mochas and call them caffeine or coffee. I really like going to the bank to get cash, ATMs just aren't as much fun. And I'd like to live in a world when people help others not because it's convenient or it makes them feel better, but because we recognize the common humanity.